Stuck in Traffic

I reckon there are three types of drivers when it comes to traffic jams.

Firstly there is the deluded driver who believes that by huffing and puffing, letting everyone know their annoyance at the delay and continually checking the time, they will speed up the dispersal of the cars.  In truth all they are doing is unsettling their mood that may affect their judgement for the rest of the journey if not the whole day.

Secondly there is the fretter, the 'if only' driver who reproaches themself for not taking the alternative route, getting off one junction earlier, checking for roadworks before leaving or failing to begin their journey earlier.  Well it's true things may have been different if another option had been taken but not necessarily better. I'm sure I'm not the only person who has turned off at the sight of a long traffic jam only to join another one created by drivers with a similar idea.  If the fretter had left earlier they may simply have ended up closer to the front of the traffic jam and, God forbid, possibly involved in it.  All that can be said for certain is that guilt and worry will have been provoked and that is not a healthy state of mind to be in.

Thirdly there is the driver for whom light has dawned - there is nothing they can do that will make the traffic jam disappear.  This driver realises the opportunity to take alternative routes or leaving earlier has gone and that there is nothing to be gained from brooding on this fact apart of course from a brief assessment of what has happened for future reference.  What can be done is leave the radio on for traffic alerts so the driver stays up-to-date, to relax a bit, chat to passengers, take charge by replanning the day and being ready to move ahead when it is possible.

What character is most likely to drive on most safely and in the the best mood for the rest of the day? 

Well dealing with the consequences of Encephalitis is a bit like that.  This is a very simplified approach I admit but it is based on my own experience of now 27 years living with acquired brain injury and depression.

It is immensely frustrating not being able to do what been as easy as breathing.  The desire to be able to do it NOW is overwhelming.  Even when the ability has been relearned, remembered, recovered the stamina to do it as much or as long as you want is missing.  Then you simply shift the frustration to why can't I do it so easily or for as long.

Well in case you've forgotten, which you won't, the poor old brain and body has been through quite a lot.  Forcing it to 'travel' at a pace that is beyond if just risks complete exhaustion and pulling you back down.

Equally fretting about and worrying that you are not following the route through life you had planned won't change the fact that you've had encephalitis in one form or another.  It won't contribute anything positive as to how you move forward.  Continually reflecting on it will give you a degree in resentment and/or guilt.  I try very hard not to 'what if' as 'what if' didn't happen nor will it happen.  This does require discipline, is not always successful but on the whole caging these thoughts so they don't pollute me is worthwhile.

Then there is the third driver of life.  Someone who acknowledges that things have happened in both the longer and more recent past, someone who listens for guidance as to what has happened in the past and is happening in the present and who seeks to put themself in the best position to move forward with their life.  As the traffic jam moves be it by a couple of yards, a hundred yards or even reaches second gear it is always moving forward.  One only reverses to let emergency vehicle through before regaining that distance.